Write Anyway

Happy Thursday, everyone!

My husband and I had a wonderful time on his birthday and he loved his presents. I rather like having special things to celebrate on Wednesdays because it seems to make the rest of the week that much brighter.

Given this week’s theme of laughter, what better Thursday Thirteen list than thirteen funny things?

I hope you all enjoy at least a few of the things I find funny.

1. What Exactly Is Marriage?

“Marriage is when you get to keep your girl and don’t have to give her back to her parents” -Eric, six years old

“When somebody’s been dating for a while, the boy might propose to the girl. He says to her, ‘I’ll take you for a whole life, or at least until we have kids and get divorced, but you got to do one particular thing for me.’ Then she says yes, but she’s wondering what the thing is and whether it’s naughty or not. She can’t wait to find out.” -Anita, nine years old
2. Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils … - Louis Hector Berlioz
3. How Does a Person Decide Whom to marry?

“You flip a nickel, and heads means you stay with him and tails means you try the next one.” -Kelly, nine years old

“My mother says to look for a man who is kind….That’s what I’ll do….I’ll find somebody who’s kinda tall and handsome.” -Carolyn, eight years old
4. Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.
5. Concerning the Proper Age to Get Married

“Once I’m done with kindergarten, I’m going to find me a wife” -Bert, five years old
6. It’s true that we don’t know what we’ve got until we lose it, but it’s also true that we don’t know what we’ve been missing until it arrives.
7. How Did Your Mom and Dad Meet?

“They were at a dance party at a friend’s house. Then they went for a drive, but their car broke down…It was a good thing, because it gave them a chance to find out about their values.” -Lottie, nine years old

“My father was doing some strange chores for my mother. They won’t tell me what kind.” -Jeremy, eight years old
8. Men are like parking spots, the good ones are taken and the free ones are handicapped.
9. What Do Most People Do on a Date?

“On the first date, they just tell each other lies, and that usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date.” -Martin, ten years old

“Many daters just eat pork chops and french fries and talk about love.” -Craig, nine years old
10. It takes 46 muscles to frown but only 4 to flip ‘em the bird.
11. When Is It Okay to Kiss Someone?

“You should never kiss a girl unless you have enough bucks to buy her a ring and her own VCR, ’cause she’ll want to have videos of the wedding.” -Allan, ten years old

“Never kiss in front of other people. It’s a big embarrassing thing if anybody sees you….If nobody sees you, I might be willing to try it with a handsome boy, but just for a few hours.” -Kally, nine years old
12. When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep — not screaming, like the passengers in his car.
13. The Great Debate: Is It Better to Be Single or Married?

“You should ask the people who read Cosmopolitan” -Kirsten, ten years old

“It’s better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need somebody to clean up after them” -Anita, nine years old

“It gives me a headache to think about that stuff. I’m just a kid. I don’t need that kind of trouble.” -Will, seven years old

Check out my other Thursday Thirteens on The Book Stacks and Fiction Scribe